Mary

Dear Dad,

Hi Dad,

Hope you are well, well, you know, besides being on the other side. What's it like where you are? I sure wish you could answer me. Seriously. Are you aware of this world or have you truly moved on to a better place? I bet you have established yourself well in the Spirit World. I hope and have faith you are  with Karen and Carol. 

From the last posts you can see Kayla has become quite a golfer. She made it to the Colorado Sate Championship by shooting an 89 in the qualifier. I'm so proud of her. So proud of her sisters too. 

Sorry I haven't written lately. So busy with family and work and to be honest I think I have lost my voice. After writing Vivus I seem to have lost some steam. I know I still have tons of stories to tell and things to say, but recently inspiration has abandoned me. 

One idea I've been thinking about came to me while I was trying to write a poem. I wrote Sad Mad Bad Dad. I realized I had the first line of a bad poem or the title of a great book that could help a lot of men out there like me. I haven't been writing lately so I thought I'd talk over some ideas with you and see how it sounds.

As men we do not know what to do about being sad. We ignore it. Run from it. We work through it. We workout. We eat. We drink. We turn to drugs and alcohol to mask the pain of sadness.We fantasize. We fight. We get angry. We get mad. We can do something with mad. We weild some control and aim our anger here or there. We hurt people. We feel guilty. Guilt allows us to turn our anger on ourselves. We hurt ourselves. We get what we think we deserve. We fail. We feel that we do not deserve to succeed. That we don't deserve to be happy.

Anger and guilt are fueled by unresolved saddness. There is a lot of saddness in the world. A lot. There is unbearable grief. There is loss to great to even imagine. There is sickness and pain, suffering and hunger. There is death. Everyone knows loneliness and fear.

It makes me sad. Being sad makes me mad. Feeling guilty I can do so little about all the injustice in the world. Being mad and guilty makes me a bad dad. A sad mad bad dad!

It has taken me a lot of hard living to learn what I am about to share. It is OK to be sad. Everything will be OK, even if it isn't. There are keys to happiness. I will share with you these keys, but only you can turn them and unlock the door. Only you can walk through.

1. Forgive yourself, you are only human.

2. Forgive those who have wronged you, even if they do not deserve it.

3. Be grateful. Gratitude will change your attitude.

4. Work on your S.O.U.L. Self, know thy Self. Take Ownership, own it. Take responsibility. Be Un-selfish and be kind. Know that you are the only you that there will ever be. Value what is unique about You. Love. Love thyself so that you may love others. So that you can love. This Love will make you part something Larger than thyself.  

5. Know that God loves you.

6. Know that God wants you to be happy.

Well, it's a work in progress, but what do you think? I think there is something there.

I'm also thinking about writing a motivational book on team building. The title is Champions. There's an acronym for it too. LOVE. Larger, commit to something Larger than thyself. Take Ownership of the teams preformance. VE value everybody! The strength of a team lies in its members differences. Synergy is created by combining what is different about each other. Powerful synergy is created by combining various strengths and rendering each other's weaknesses irrelevant. 

Thanks Dad for listening. I miss You.

Love,

Bitty-buddy

Kayla at State Championship

Kayla is a Golfer!

Kayla qualified for the State Golf Tournament today having her best score ever at Regionals! So proud of my K-bear. She has improved so much this year. If she continues to enjoy the sport there’s no telling how good she can be. 

Coming up she has Nationals in Speech and Debate and States for golf. She’s first in her class with a 4.2 grade point average and misses a lot of school competing in golf, don’t know how she does it. As a DDD, fortunately I do not need to understand or know how she does it. I do appreciate her hard work, dedication, and talent and once again it has paid off. 

I got there in time to see her finish with four straight Pars! 

Senior Day and Miami University Graduation 1988

Senior Day at Miami 1988

Don't have much to say, don't remember much about this day. 31 years ago. Hard to believe it's been that long. My dad looks really happy. 

Graduation from Miami University 1988

Big J probably took this picture. Again I wish I remembered more from this day, but a lot of my Miami memories are like that. Love and honor to Miami. Blessed by the education, but still haunted a little by the experience.

Marine August 1947, Merchant Marine June 1945. At home with mom in ‘46!

This Marine Corps. picture of my dad from August 1947 is amazing. . This is one year prior to enrolling at University of Maryland. He is twenty years old, a Marine, just after the war.

This Maritime Marine picture is from June 1945.

This picture of my dad with his mom is from October 1946.

Mary and I had a great trip West! Spring Break 2019

My dad’s .22

My brother just sent me a picture of my dad holding a rabbit that he’d killed with his .22. I remember this picture. A line in my very first DDD post was something like one year he killed a rabbit. He said his mom would make rabbit stew.

There is so much here I don’t know where to start. First, the rifle. I have it in my gun safe. Has his initials JK carved into it. Still shoots. My big brother gave it to me a few years back for Christmas. I’ve always wondered how old it is. This photo is dated 1944 so it’s at least 75 years old! Pretty cool. Also this date means he becomes a Marine before the end of the year. Lastly, he is so young, wearing a jersey, and that calic and the jet black hair. 

I’ve been dwelling in’s the past a lot lately, so I will be sure to make my next post a little more current events.

 

I

I dwell in the past

My wife told me once I dwell in the past. I was defensive, but realized she was right. I just didn’t like the word dwell. I guess this post prooves she right. All these people are my relatives on my mother’s side. I got this album from Carol. It had water damage, but I salvaged most of the photos. The one date I saw written in pencil on the back of one of these said 1901. 1901! Almost 120 years old. This first picture fascinates me, she is beautiful, striking. The lace collar and shirt, fur, she looks comfortable, calm, elegant. 

Grandparents Keith and Penrose

The Keiths.

The Penrose family.