Been quite some time since I’ve written you a letter. Sorta feel like you read everything I write anyways and maybe the reason I blog so much. Did you see the latest book I published? Kinda out there I know, but I’m really proud of it. Maybe the most authentic thing I’ve written to date. Not much much of a market for it I’m afraid, but thankfully that’s not why I wrote it. Anyway I was inspired to write you because I’ve just done something I wanted to share with you. I helped someone deal with a problem both you and I share. A stranger in a group I follow asked for advise on dealing with anger and rage. This is what I said, “ I get it. Serious anger and rage issues here my friend. A wise councilor shared something that changed everything for me. There are two root causes of anger and rage: Sadness and Guilt. Sadness or grief make you feel helpless so we turn it into anger because anger is empowering. What can you do with sadness? Cry? But anger you can do something with, self righteous anger especially and grow it into to rage and you really can get some things done. Usually what we do with anger turns bad resulting in guilt. Turning our anger on ourselves resulting in more guilt and sadness. So don’t focus on letting go of the anger. Work on resolving the sadness, grief and pain in your life. Happy people are seldom angry. Dealing with my grief was the hardest thing I’ve ever done but the most rewarding thing I do.”
I hope it was helpful.
It’s my birthday today. I’m 54 years old. Hard to believe. Your Bitty-buddy is middle aged. My body feels every one of those years, but my heart and mind feel good. I got to play golf today with some good friends. My family, our family, well I’m just the most blessed man on the face of the earth and I try to describe our last few days, weeks, months together I would surely cry. Kayla’s graduating Valedictorian of her class and the way she’s dealing with this COVID-19 situation is amazing. Her prom is canceled, her Senior golf season canceled, IB testing canceled, graduation probably canceled and she’s taking it so well. Mary and Chloe are really missing school and their friends, but the three of them together appear to be able to handle anything. Suzy is the most beautiful person I’ve ever known. I love our family so much and credit you with my capacity to do so. I miss you Dad. Thank you for being here.
Love,
A
