Saturday, February 9, 2013

why joy?

The post that precedes this one was a major style change. I wrote it in the classic Facebook inspirational post style because that is how I saw it in my head. Late in the afternoon on Friday I got the bad news I didn't get the job in Nashville. On Wednesday morning I got the call I had made it to the final three and was invited to interview in Nashville 8am Thursday. It was four hours of intense interviewing with a national director, operations manager, and two district business managers from Pfizer. After booking the flights and hotel arrangements and in the next 24 hours speaking to 6 of 9 team members of the district I would be joining, studying all the research I had gathered on the key accounts of the territory I would be working, learned the specifics of the managed care environment for Tennessee, familiarized myself with the human growth hormone drugs I would sell, studied the disease states of Human Growth Hormone Deficiency and Macromegaly, arranging for two letters of reference emails for the interview team, traveling halfway across the country and back on less than 2 hours of sleep and by 5pm Friday back at my desk taking the call that I didn't get it. Once again Pfizer very politely said they didn't want me. Saturday morning I woke up severely depressed. It was a horrible funk. I was so upset I found myself avoiding my family because I was afraid I would loose it. I just felt like crying.

Later that morning I saw on my Blackberry an email from the national director who I had interview with and he had sent a reply to my thank you email from the day before. He obviously knew I wasn't the chosen one, but he sent a reply that changed everything. He said he hoped my youngest daughter's ear infection would heal quickly and wished my family a joyful weekend while baptizing my other daughter. And there it was. There was all kind of joy to be had and I wasn't letting it happen. I cried tears of joy in a very hot shower and all I could think was, "Joy Will Happen if I Let It...Joy Will Happen if I Let It...Joy Will Happen if I let It!" And It did. I got myself out of the way and there it was. My wife introduced Chloe to the congregation in awesome fashion and I performed the baptism and we celebrated later with friends at the Golden Corral. There was real joy in our family. The kind of Joy I had been standing in the way of since Christmas morning almost a month earlier. Being laid of is stressful, but I now refuse to allow any worldly circumstance to exclude me and my family of the Joy God has given us.

Joy will happen if you let it.

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